This is something I’ve been thinking a lot about lately. For the last few weeks, I have been reading the Bible and other Christian literature, and have been definitely interested in it. I would not say though that I’m ready to do the typical Christian decision of putting my faith in Jesus. I really still do not know. I am interested, but I don’t know.
Christians seem to have this expectation and pressure on non-believers to make a decision quickly. The more I think about that, the less I agree with it. It is a big deal to decide to follow a religion, if you truly are going to follow it and put forth the effort to properly do it. It’s not at all only about making the decision, it’s about making an informed, well thought-out decision with a good foundation of knowledge and understanding about what you are actually following, and how to do it. How can you follow a God if you really don’t know this God, and what it means to follow him?
I have decided to not feel this pressure or rush to make a decision. I am interested currently, so I am taking time to read and to try and understand what it’s all about, ask difficult questions, challenge things that I find weird about Christianity, have conversations, etc. And, I feel good about that.
The question then comes though; Is God pleased with what I am doing? Is he glad that I am pursuing knowledge of him? Or, is he in heaven with his arms crossed saying something like, “Well, he still hasn’t put his faith in me, so he’s still in line for hell..” If I were to die today, would I go to hell according to Christianity? I recognize that these questions cannot be answered with accuracy, and I’m fine with that. But, I still think about it and wonder what God thinks about it.
I was talking with a good friend yesterday and he suggested I read Acts 17, so I did. There were two things there that stood out to me. Verse 11 says, “… they received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so.” And verse 27, “that they should seek God, in the hope that they might feel their way toward him and find him.” These verses are encouraging to me, and seem to go against modern Christian evangelism, namely, telling someone that Jesus died for them and expecting them to put their faith in Jesus right then and there.
This is what I’m doing, taking time and effort to learn more, in hopes that I might feel my way toward God.
If you are a Christian, what do you think? Again, I know these questions cannot be known for sure, but I’m definitely curious what you think. Is God pleased with where I am at, and what I’m doing? And, do you think I would go to hell if I were to die today?